[Life★] The Difference Between “Good on Paper” and “Good For You”
(P1) If you’re on Match.com or any other online dating site like my friend J, you’ve likely already learned this lesson: Men who look good on paper don’t always look good in your life. “He’s attractive, got a good job, loves dogs—but something’s just missing,” J usually laments to me after each date.
(P2) I have another friend whose male BFF is also paper-perfect: He’s wickedly smart, funny, compassionate and giving. He’s got a great job that pays well. He even likes cats, and she’s a #catlady. She’s known him for eight years, and I can tell you that while he’d date her in a hot-minute, she’d never give him a second romantic glance. Something’s just missing, she’d say.
(P3) Call it chemistry or magic, but there’s something you just can’t manufacture no matter how paper-perfect someone appears.
(P4) Sometimes, we women wish we could force ourselves to fall for the good-on-paper guy, especially those of us whose hearts go pitter-patter for bad-boy types. (Beware: Bad boys who’ve falsified their romantic resumes so that they appear good on paper.) But alas, if he’s not “good for you,” it doesn’t matter how hard we try.
(P5) So what does “good for you” really mean? A “good for you” guy makes you laugh, deep in your belly. He shares your values. He makes your toes curl in pleasure. A “good for you” guy takes your breath away without even trying. He is considerate of your feelings. He turns you on in a turn of phrase. In other words, a “good for you” guy is everything you can’t possibly see on paper.
(P6) That doesn’t mean a “good for you” guy can’t also be good on paper—of course he can! I just mean that there’s no way to tell from a piece of paper if a guy will end up being good for you, no matter how impressive his credentials.
(P7) Have you ever tried to date a “good on paper” guy and it didn’t work out? Was the “good for you” guy you dated also good on paper, or not so much?
VOCAB (testing-kr only): [L020B] GOOD ON PAPER_VOCAB
TO PRINT (testing-kr only): [L020B] GOOD ON PAPER
If you found the passage difficult to read or had problems understanding specific words or idiomatic expressions, please discuss them with your tutor. The following discussion questions should be answered in your own words and with your own arguments.
- Briefly summarize the content of the article in your own words.
- What does the author mean by “men who look good on paper don’t always look good in your life” (P1)?
- What kind of guys (or girls) do you fall for? Describe their looks, character, or any other traits you seek in your SO (significant other).
- Have you ever tried to date a “good on paper” guy and it didn’t work out? Was the “good for you” guy you dated also good on paper, or not so much?