DON’T SAY “I’M FINE” WHEN YOU’RE NOT
(P1) Saying someone is being FAKE is a common complaint. According to a new study, that’s just the IMPRESSION people get when you’re not honest about your feelings. Apparently, it’s better to just tell people how you really feel than to give an OFFHAND, polite response to a question like “How are you?”
(P2) Researchers from the University of Oregon found that when people MASKED their feelings—even if they were simply trying to avoid sharing negative emotions with others—they were perceived as unpleasant, distant, less EXTROVERTED, and less likable. In other words, putting on a HAPPY FACE and trying not to dump your bad mood on your friends or coworkers might actually BACKFIRE. So don’t do this.
(P3) What people would rather hear? The truth. Imagine that! So instead of just saying “I’m fine,” you might want to try “Eh, I’ve been better.”
(P4) “It’s been a rough day” and “Not my finest hour” would work too. It might take some getting used to, but it can improve relationships between you and those around you. It might help benefit your mood too: Researchers found that holding back negative feelings only made participants more UPSET, and those who did this reported less satisfaction with their social life and a tougher time getting close to others.
If you found the passage difficult to read or had problems understanding specific words or idiomatic expressions, please discuss them with your tutor. The following discussion questions should be answered in your own words and with your own arguments.
- Briefly summarize the content of the article in your own words.
- Do you believe that it is more important to be polite or to be honest?
- Do you share your feelings with your co-workers, or only with family and personal friends?
- What are your personal strategies for coping with a bad day?
- Are you more of an extrovert or an INTROVERT?
EXPRESSIONS TO PRACTICE:
What do the following expressions mean? Practice using each expression in a sentence; extra points if you can use it in conversation.
- Happy face